‘I will never forget seeing him leave, and the little coat and hat he was wearing’

For many former residents, last week's report by the Commission on Mother and Baby homes brought horrific memories flooding back of abuse, neglect and trauma.

Many horrendous stories have been recounted by survivors of the homes in recent days including highly distressing evidence given to the commission.

However, one Beauparc woman has a different story to tell - she spent nearly two years in the Ard Mhuire Mother Home in Dunboyne - where she says she was very well treated.

Anna Burke (nee Daly) was heartbroken when she gave up her son for adoption but said she knew from the beginning she wouldn't be able to keep him.

“I will never forget seeing him leave, and the little coat and hat he was wearing.

“I was devastated but I couldn't say a bad word about Dunboyne.

“My heart goes out to all those mothers and children who were treated so badly in so many of the homes. I know I was lucky. They were good to us in Dunboyne,” she says.

Anna's story has a happy ending - she finally found her son, who was adopted by a couple in the US, when he was 28 and they have been part of each other’s lives ever since.

Dunboyne Castle, now home to a luxury hotel, was a mother and baby home run by the Good Shepherd sisters from 1955 until 1991.

The Commission has received very few complaints about the conditions in Dunboyne or the physical treatment of the mothers there.

“All the evidence seen by the Commission and the evidence of the vast majority of former residents who spoke to the Commission suggests that Dunboyne provided comfortable, warm accommodation and the residents were well looked after physically,” the report states.

Anna was just 17 when she became pregnant. Her parents told her she was a disgrace and that she would have to go to Dunboyne. The baby's father had left for England and she was lost without him,

“I knew I had no other option. From the beginning, I knew I would be giving up my baby for adoption.”

Her son was born on 22nd August 1960 in Holles Street Hospital and she called him Raymond.

She lived with Raymond in Dunboyne for 19 months before he was taken away to St Clare's Stamullen, from where he was adopted by an American couple.

While Anna went on to have three other boys - Brendan, Feilim and Keith - she never forgot her first born and felt the pain of his loss for the next 28 years.

She has no complaints about how she was treated in Dunboyne.

“They were lovely to us. The building was lovely - I'm not surprised it was turned onto a hotel. The nuns brought us to Holles Street for appointments. They got films in for us and we went on trips to the seaside. There was a tennis court and we could wheel the prams into the village.”

Raymond was born in Holles Street and remained with Anna in Dunboyne for 19 months. Although she knew from the outset that he would be adopted, she was devastated.

“I remember watching out the window as he got into the van. I remember the little coat and hat and the teddy I had given him. I never forgot him. I was always thinking of him, especially on his birthday and at Christmas.”

Anna remained in Dunboyne for another eight months and was then sent to a Good Shepherd convent in Limerick because her father had decided she “wasn't ready for the world.”

She spent a year in Limerick before getting a job in Mount Carmel hospital in Dublin.

She got married at 23 and went to have three more sons and now lives in Ballymun. From the outset, her husband knew she had a son in the US.

A chance encounter on a bus led Anna to be reunited with her son when he was 28-years-old

“I had been looking for him, but I met a Good Shepherd nun and was chatting to her. I told her about my son and she said she'd see what she could do.”

Raymond had also been looking for his birth mother, so they were put in contact with each other.

“I wrote to him and he came over to see me. I met him at Dublin airport. It was great. I knew him straight away when he came through the arrival gate at the airport.

“There were a lot of tears, but we had a coffee and then got a taxi to my home in Ballymun where he met his brothers.”

The family has been in constant contact since. Anna has visited Raymond in Boston and he has visited Ireland regularly. They holidayed together in Florida and when Raymond and his wife came to Ireland for Brendan's 50th birthday, the couple, along with Anna and other family members stayed in the Dunboyne Castle Hotel.

“The first time he came over, we visited Dunboyne too. It was still a mother and baby home and he met his baby nurse, Sr Ambrose.”

Anna also met Raymond's adopted mother, Josephine, who has sadly since died.

“She was a lady. We got on very well. She could have changed Raymond's name when she adopted him, like many others did, but she kept his name. He still had the coat and hat I had dressed him and the teddy.”

“It was heartbreaking parting with him and the following 28 years were very tough, but it is great to be back in contact.

“There have been so many awful stories of what happened in these homes and I just feel sick thinking about it. Those poor girls,” she said.