From broken benches to building bridges... Nikki Hayes shares her journey at Samhain Festival
Tracy Carroll
Nikki Hayes took to the stage on Sunday at An Samhain with Dee Laffan, sharing her journey battling addiction, sleeping rough, homelessness, to now looking forward to celebrating two years sober on 17th November.
Nikki was, and still is a well-known voice on the airways, DJing since the age of 16, from the outside Nikki looked to have it all, until addiction took it all.
Nikki lost her marriage, her career and worst of all Farah, her daughter, in the spiral of addiction, plunging into a darkness that would see her life stripped of everything she once knew and those she loved.
“I was so deep in addiction I couldn’t see the damage I was doing to myself and my loved ones.”
Nikki found herself homeless, sleeping rough and relying on soup kitchens to support her most basic need, a hot meal.
The Lighthouse Café on Pearse Street, Dublin, offered Nikki a safe space, a place where she “felt like a person” as “homelessness makes you feel invisible, dirty and of no value”.
The Lighthouse Café cater for people from all walks of life. They provide hot meals, and in addition basic items, such as clothing, sanitary items, sleeping bags and most importantly, they offer a door to change, a pathway to recovery with Tiglin.
One evening in November 2023 Nikki was at the Lighthouse, when a key worker approached asking her would she like an assessment and she said yes.
Nikki took the first step to change and entered the Tiglin Recovery Program, spending 16 and half months in recovery and a further six months in transitional housing, as she remained homeless.
“Recovery was intense, extremely tough, it is almost like reprogramming your brain, going back to the cause before the addiction, because there is always a reason, a need for behavioural change.”
Nikki is now in her own home, an apartment in Dublin which she received the keys to a few weeks back, a fresh start and a step in restoring her relationship with Farah, which she says is "the most important part" of her life.
Since coming through recovery, Nikki said: “my whole outlook on life has changed. I no longer value money or material things, I value people, those I love.”
“You need to own up to the chaos your addiction has brought to the lives of others. Addiction is very selfish. It’s about you and no one else.”
Addiction, Nikki says, does not just affect the person using, it ripples through families, friends, partners, it causes such destruction.
“Rebuilding relationships takes time, but for those I love, my daughter, my family, friends, I am fully accountable and will do everything I can to build trust again.”
Nikki now travels the length and breath of Ireland speaking to schools, charities, addiction and family services to help raise awareness, bringing the lived experience. Through her own story, she shares that change can happen, there is hope, and with the right supports you can take back your life.
Nikki is very passionate about building on family supports services, something that is lacking nationally.
“There is a real need to bridge the gap between the person in addiction and the need to support the families around them”.
“Families need to be supported to live with someone in addiction. If supported, they can be there in whatever way is safe for the family member.”
Nikki’s focus now is to support the families navigating the carnage that addiction brings.
“When a person goes into treatment, they are safe, but their families are left behind, left to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives, but they are also families trapped in the cycle of their loved one in active addiction. We need to step up and build a national support service.”
If you or a loved one need supports the following services can be contacted.
FASN (Family Addiction Support Network) offers peer lead support, if a family member wises to reach out.
Call or text confidential line 087 904 6405
Tiglin Ashford
Click here.