‘I want all the good deeds that Aaron did to live on’

A MEATH mother is celebrating the life of her son, who passed away just over a year ago, with a unique organ donor awareness event.

Aaron Cantwell's mother, Naomi Dunleavy, wanted to celebrate the 20 years they had with Aaron by remembering his kindness - and has created ‘Ducky Deeds’, his alter ego who encourages people to be kind to one another.

“Ducky is a character I created to honour Aaron's memory. He was an organ donor, an empath with a big heart,” she says.

Aaron, who was a lifeguard and swim coach at Aura in Navan, had indicated to his family that he wanted to be an organ donor, and when he died following an accident on the Trim Road last year, his organs were donated, saving four lives.

Aaron's last good deed was for his organs to be donated after a road traffic accident, and therefore his alter ego's first good deed is a Ducky Derby swim event bringing together donor families and transplant at the beginning of Organ Donor Awareness Week on Sunday 21st of May for a Swim Relay.

Those who wished to take part, participated in time trials in Aura swimming pools all around the country and the fastest 30 qualified for the Ducky Derby in Aura Leisure Link in Navan on 21st May.

“We have invited organ donor families, living donors and recipients to attend the event. The families of donors will get the chance to talk to donor families and vice versa, there will be a cup of tea after the derby where people can meet and chat,” she says.

Organ recipient and donor families can contact Naomi to come and watch the Derby @duckydeed or duckydeed@gmail.com Attending the national launch with her will be her husband David and son Adam.

Naomi says Aaron was emotionally intelligent beyond his years. “He was a swim coach and lifeguard at Aura Navan or Trim and always with a broad smile on his face and a kind word for everyone.”

She wants to encourage the public to do good deeds and be kind to others as a reflection of her late son Aaron's personality.

“We don't want Aaron to be remembered for his death, we want him to be remembered for the 20 years he was with us and how positive that was.

“You can either live with the loss or be grateful for the 20 years we had with him. I am grateful for those great 20 years.

“I want the good deeds he has done to live on.”

She accidentally came across a piece he wrote in his journal about the importance of being kind to others and doing good deeds. “I’m going to be myself and be nice to everyone I can. Even if a small thing I do makes someone smile then I did a good job because everyone has their battles and, if even for a few seconds they are happy, it makes a difference,” he said.

Through Ducky, Naomi is urging people to be kind. “A Ducky Deed is a conscious act of kindness carried out with intent. It makes a difference to the recipient, by placing them in a better position than before the act. It’s not random, it calls for careful consideration.

“It requires self-compassion to accept ourselves as we are and know that we are more than enough to make a difference, motivation to look up from our devices and into the eyes of others, empathy to see the world from others’ perspectives, not just our own, curiosity to ask others what they need, rather than what’s convenient for us to do or give, courage to actually carry out the kind deed, no matter how hard and selflessness to do it without hoping for praise or recognition.”

“Aaron loved being a swimming teacher and helping young children with their confidence. He was very open and a good listener. During lockdown, many young people struggled. Two of his friends told me, separately that he had saved their lives by being there for them and listening to them. That was his super power.”

Naomi said she is grateful that Aaron is an organ donor. “Aaron gets to live on in somebody else's body.”

She is urging people to become organ donors and to speak to their families letting their views be known. “Even if you carry an organ donor card or you have it on your licence, the doctors still have to ask the family's permission, so I would urge people to make their wishes clear.”

She explained that even though Aaron had spoken about wanting to donate his organs, they had a moment when they nearly changed their minds. “It came as quite a shock to us that they wouldn't be turning off the life support machine so we couldn't say goodbye. But then we remembered that this was what he wanted. He was very clear about it.”

An open letter written to transplant recipients by Aaron's brother, Adam while in ICU in the final hours of Aaron's journey before his organs were donated sums up the benefits of organ donation.

“From a place of pure love and adoration, although this was taken from us far too soon, we hope it can be given to you at just the right time.

“This organ was used by someone loved and cared for by many, it aided them in spreading love and affection to anyone that needed it.

“All we ask is that it can aid you in living your life to the fullest and to your choosing.

“From our family to yours this gift will live, and love, on in you.”