‘Sometimes we just look at each other and think we can’t believe we have him’

A TRIM mum who lost nine babies through miscarriage and stillbirth says Christmas has more meaning after finally giving birth to a miracle baby boy.

On May 16th, 2007, Michelle and Stephen Daly’s life changed forever when their son, Christopher was tragically stillborn at 28 weeks.

Eight devastating miscarriages followed with Michelle admitting she had “given up hope of becoming a mother.”

Her journey of heartache ended with her tenth pregnancy that finally yielded the couple's 'rainbow baby' - their healthy little boy Dylan Patrick Daly who entered the world on 12th June 2020, weighing 7lb 0.5oz and making all her struggles worth it.

Michelle says she feels “blessed” approaching their second Christmas with little Dylan after longing to be a mother for so many years. She added:

“I was never a fan of Christmas because I used to look at other couples with their children and it brought home what we were missing out on.

“Christmas is definitely more exciting that we have our boy now and everything for us is now about Dylan, Christmas is all about Santa and the excitement and looking forward to the happiness on his face on Christmas morning.

“He is mesmerized by all of the lights and festivities, mind you I'm redecorating the tree everyday!

“We are going to be leaving cookies and milk and food out for the reindeer.”

“Sometimes we look at each other and think we can’t believe we have him, we feel so lucky after all the loss to finally have our baby,” says Michelle.

In 2007, at around seven months pregnant, the Trim woman went into early labour and due to complications during the birth her baby boy Christopher was tragically stillborn weighing just 2lb. - Michelle originally from Dublin admits that the grief was often too much to cope with.

“They lifted him up onto my chest and I remember looking at him this tiny little thing, he wasn’t moving but he just looked like he was asleep.

“I was a complete wreck, the only time I left the house was when Stephen brought me over to my parents for dinner and even at that I was just sobbing all of the time, I’d only sleep when I cried myself to sleep, then you wake up and the pain hits you again.

“All those loses took their toll on me over time.

“I ended up getting grief counselling, it really does help talking to somebody else and I really would recommend any couple going through anything like that to try it.”

In the UK, New draft guidance from the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists could see extra care offered from a woman's first miscarriage. Currently, support is only offered after three consecutive miscarriages. Michelle says she believes similar support should be offered here. She added:

“With the pregnancies after that they kept telling me you need to lose weight, they kept making me feel like the onus was in me and it was my fault that these things were happening.

“I have polycystic ovaries which makes it hard to conceive and carry a pregnancy too but they would put it down to the things they had already diagnosed rather than do proper investigations.

“Early intervention is better and find doctor that suits you. “

It was only when Michelle started attending a new GP in Trim that everything changed as she explains:

“It was only through meeting my GP Mary Mulqueen that she got me on the right path. She discovered that I had a blood disorder which causes the blood to clot and can affect your pregnancy and she put me on medication.

“She became a good friend and recommended Karen Flood a consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist and a certified specialist in Maternal Fetal Medicine in the Rotunda.

“I had given up hope at that stage but then discovered I was pregnant and decided to have the baby in the Rotunda.

Dylan was born at 39 weeks by Emergency C Section realising the couple’s dreams of starting a family.

“I just couldn't believe when they wrapped him up and brought him over and he was just staring at me, our miracle baby was finally here healthy and happy.

“I just didn’t think I could love anyone as much we do Dylan.

“It was only through Stephen’s support and positivity; he was always saying it will happen for us and it did.

“I’d just tell anyone not to give up on their dream of having a family no matter how painful the road is, there is hope.”

Michelle's who suffered further turmoil when her dad Patrick passed away suddenly just six weeks before Dylan was born says she feels her dad is looking over her precious son.

“It was traumatic and hit me really hard losing dad, having Dylan was the best thing to happen to me at the worst time in my life.

“I have a picture beside the kitchen table and not long ago Dylan pointed and waved and said hi granddad, I couldn't believe it, I think he is Dylan's guardian angel.”