On 'stock patrol' ... a new tale from Bective Bridge

The Three Musketeers on a day out

A wise man once said that a high vis jacket is enough to get you access into anywhere and when it came to sneaking onto the set of the new Matt Damon/Ridley Scott film in Bective it proved no different.

While security around the set was very visible, my partners in crime and myself told them we had to check on some cattle and we were waved on without a second thought. Upon reaching the set we put on some face masks, which added another layer of credibility to our disguises and we simply blended in with the rest of the crew who were busy rushing around the set. We kept our two metres away!

From our vantage point on a hill, directly behind a gallows, with some terrifyingly real looking fake bodies, we were able to get a glimpse into how a film set works and it was incredible. 800 cast and crew rushing around the set organising costumes, cameras, extras, props which included dozens of cattle, sheep, geese, horses, donkeys, rowboats, dogs, ravens and a few very vocal pigs, all of which was coordinated with military-like precision, with director Ridley Scott audibly conducting proceedings over a walkie talkie. (Was it one of these pigs later spotted running down Swainstown Hill?)

While we initially feared our disguises lacked credibility and thought we may be caught and kicked off the set when it came to lunchtime, when one of the crew asked us whether we wanted chicken or beef we knew we were safe.

After a few hours during a break in filming, we decided to go for a walk through the set to see if we could spot any famous faces. We had almost given up and were about to go home when 20 metres away we spotted a suspiciously familiar figure, dressed as a knight and with his face covered in fake blood…

I excitedly poked one of my accomplices in the ribs and gasped :

"Is that him?",

"Who?" came the reply.

"Damo…. I mean Matt Damon", I whispered barely able to contain myself.

"It is and all," he said, his voice noticeably shakier.

We snapped a few quick photos and stood in awe watching the Hollywood icon, as he casually stood and chatted with members of the crew.

Our presence raised some eyebrows as after a while a woman with a security jacket and an authoritarian voice approached and asked to see our security passes. We sheepishly told her we were there on "stock patrol", but it turns out that trick has a limited shelf life and she politely asked us to leave.

Having already spent the day on an actual blockbuster set, gotten to see Matt Damon up close and hot chicken dinner we had pushed our luck as far as it would take us, so we gladly obliged her and left without causing a fuss, delighted with our day's work.